On this week's episode of Bad Gamers, @Dan Oravasaari and @Chandler Wood talk about severed feet, having low hopes for a knockout title, couch co-op, and they write a eulogy for the Vita. To top it off, Dan runs out of beer and has to settle for a cocktail (ginger ale, peach vodka, and Grand Marnier), while Chandler keeps it classic with a Shock Top Belgian White, but they both forget to mention it until the end (much like I forgot to write about their brews with @D'yani last week). This isn't one that you're going to want to miss, especially if you're the kind of person who likes to talk about games that suck. Ain't No Party Like a Foot Party! Too bad that you guys aren't going to leak those videos of other PSLS personnel acting a'fool. That would be some major ad revenue from employees of other Crave Online entities. I get it, though. You have to worry about people getting mad and all that, who really wants to piss off someone in 2014? Aren't the troll wars over? That reminds me - The Mystery of Crytek: Is It All Over But the CryENGINE? Somehow a rumor got out that Crytek sucks at paying their employees because they're broke. I don't know what kinds of laws exist in different European countries to help govern things like this, but I know that not paying your employees for a long time is illegal in the United States. It would also be completely unprofessional for Crytek's PR to blow this off completely if it were true. Something more along the lines of, "We don't comment on rumors about internal affairs," would be a lot more kosher. As for the scenario where Crytek actually is a bust - I'm going to say that I actually don't like them. They come out with some mold-breaking games with breath-taking graphics, but it's all fluff. All of their games made with the CryENGINE are gorgeous and push the limits of gameplay on their respective platforms, but the problem is that the games have no depth at all. It's just a bunch of pretties everywhere. I think it would be genius for them to collaborate with someone who knows how to write powerful storylines with complex character development. Regardless of whether they're broke or not, this would really amp up the profitability of the things that they have to offer. However, if they're too broke to do that, then hopefully they sell their assets to some major developer like Naughty Dog who can get it right and could benefit from the tech. Battlefield: Bad Company - Godzilla?! For the joke of the week, apparently DICE doesn't know why people like the Battlefield: Bad Company series, so they're asking for help from those of us who care about their games. Just kidding - that isn't a joke; they're clueless and want input. I don't care what it is that people tell them. I just want Battlefield Godzilla, and the Bad Gamers crew are with me on this. Godzilla is an iconic character in cinematic history who is incredibly memorable, much like the experiences felt in the Battlefield: Bad Company series. Generic shooters have long been over-saturating the market, so Battlefield is one of the franchises that we've come to expect as a major contender in higher quality experiences. Likewise, Godzilla could add to the creative palette, and make it mean a lot more when the destructible environments are being rebuilt by construction workers and other volunteer citizens who are scared shitless of his existence. Battlefield: Bad Company - Godzilla is the least that they could do for us. We need this. Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare Still Looks [Surprisingly] Good I don't have a lot to say about new Call of Duty stuff. I'm not a fan of the series at all. Still, if I keep seeing badass videos like this one, then I'm pretty sure that I'll be purchasing my first personal copy of a Call of Duty game sometime soon. New DualShock 4 Controllers Are Coming Soon! None of them are red or purple. Actually, my wife wants a pink one to replace her dead DS3, too. Spoilers Killed The Witcher 3 This kind of bullshit makes me mad, but it happens to be a serious problem that is clouding up every sector of the Internet. People seriously love to ruin things for other people. If you don't remember the "Snape Kills Dumbledore" memes from several years ago, that's okay - things are worse now. Now people break into Google Drive accounts and still alpha builds of video games so they can tell everyone the secrets and watch the world burn. No thanks, guys. This isn't hacktivism or anything of the sort - this is some good ol' fashioned bullshit. Thanks to PSLS for being responsible and not spreading all of this stuff as rumors for everyone who reads about the game. Like you guys, I try to distance myself from some things that seem incredibly exciting for me, and it's reassuring to find that you guys are taking proactive positions in keeping that kind of poppycock out of the PSLS ecosystem. The one good lesson that we can learn from this is "Fear the Banhammer." The Order: 1886 Is Going to Be the Next PS4 Flagship This is a scary topic for me. I haven't seen a whole lot about the game (see above rant regarding The Witcher 3), but the things that I've been seeing give me a bittersweet glimpse of what greatness should be awaiting us. With it being confirmed that The Order: 1886 is supposed to showcase the PS4's power, I'm a little bit worried. Those are incredibly stakes to wager against the other games in development, and reading things about framerates versus cinematics is unnerving, to say the least. It's not that I'm a framerate whore or anything like that, but seeing that a game that is supposed to encompass the PlayStation LifeStyle and put it into perspective is kind of a double-edged sword. On one hand, you have a potentially awesome game to play eventually, but on the other - you have the confidence of console elitists to gauge as you're putting this thing on the market. I'm not being cautious. I'm downright terrified of what is to come. Hopefully it'll be as good as the promise they made. Dead Rising: The Motion Picture You guys will have to bring me up to speed on this, but isn't Dead Rising already spoofing a well established series of movies? I'm pretty sure that the one that I played had a dude dodging zombies in a shopping mall, not completely dissimilar to Dawn of the Dead, one of the benchmarks for zombie movies. While it wouldn't be fair to say that I completed any of the games (check my trophy list - I played that shit at somebody else's house), it should go without saying that a Dead Rising movie should go above and beyond anything the games have offered and bring new and surprising events to the table. My highest item on the wishlist - a Tickle Me Elmo gunblade. No Sleep For Sony Sony better get to pleating their pants if they want to keep up the stock of PS4s in Europe, because they can't stop running out products! That's an excellent problem to have for a company that has had its ups and downs in the last several years (more downs from a corporate standpoint, sadly), but maybe it's a problem that's going to help them continue to build momentum for the late 2014 holiday season. That's what I'm hoping is the case. Entwined In Mediocrity I read @D'yani's review of Entwined, and I was disheartened to see that the beautifully crafted story from the E3 announcement was a complete and utter load of filler garbage to cover up for a game that's just meh. While I'm still likely to at least play a demo (did they make one?), I'm kind of proud of myself for not having a knee-jerk reaction to the announcement and just blowing $10 on another Dyad or Polybius (yeah, I went there) clone. With no depth to speak of, this game sounds like its story has been outshined by Sparkle 2. Crikey! Fuck You, Vita: Eulogy For a Friend So we heard about Final Fantasy Type-0 coming to PS4 and Xbox One instead of Vita, Brohei calling the Vita a companion device, and Brohei also confirming that there were going to be fewer 1st-party titles coming through the pipeline. What could be more disheartening than that? I didn't think anything could, but reading that Jim Ryan (SCEE President) said it was unlikely that we'll be seeing anymore AAA Vita games and PlayStation Strategic Content demigod Shahid Ahmad (who I respect and admire dearly) say that Vita owners buy the shit out of indies - I'm out of breath from run-on sentences. Hint: Because the 3DS has Pokemon, Zelda, Fire Emblem and Smash Bros. Okay, not to pick on Shahid Ahmad (seriously, I love this guy and read his tweets religiously), but what other choice do Vita owners have than to buy indies? They're easy to pick up and put down, and they're like $5-$20 as opposed to the $40 premium for the 10-20 larger games from which we have to choose. I loved Ragnarok Odyssey, Soul Sacrifice is amazing, Gravity Rush took me by surprise at how innovative the controls were, and I've heard great things about Uncharted: Golden Abyss. What blows my mind, however, is that I got 3 of those games for free from PS Plus, and the other one required that I go on a trek (over an hour from my house) to find a physical copy because of low confidence in niche software by every video game retailer within an hour of me (around 8 GameStops, 2 Best Buys, etc). Here's a hint - Vita owners buy indies because Plus subscribers got most of the best flagship titles for free. Dragon's Crown and Final Fantasy X HD are phenomenal games, but they're not Vita exclusives. Assassin's Creed III: Liberation would have been better with a few patches (or another delay...), but it was remastered and ported to PS3 before Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag's Aveline missions had the chance to make people curious about that girl from the Vita game. I know not all of that is Sony's fault, but having average-performing proprietary memory cards that cost too much money and a lack of seamless cloud saving (like in PS Now) for cross-play titles, and a lack of 1st-party AA title (medium-sized budget, like what Nintendo does for 3DS) support instead of AAA is what is dooming the most powerful handheld on the market. I'm a huge fan of the Sony brand, but I hate to be one of the only people I know who owns a Vita. Destiny of Spirits has potential, but there is no marketing for it. Killzone: Mercenary has potential, but I haven't seen any commercials or ads. I can watch Netflix and use Skype, too, but only people who read gaming sites know that since nobody owns a Vita. Grassroots campaigns aren't good marketing plans for handhelds - advertisements on Comedy Central, [adult swim], Nickelodeon, and Animal Planet are. Looking for a more affluent crowd to buy the expensive stuff? Air ads on HBO before Game of Thrones comes on or during new episodes of The Walking Dead. This isn't rocket science, it's basic marketing that involves throwing some money out there. Any other major company knows that it takes money to make money. I'm currently on a Vita spending hiatus. I hope you understand, my favorite handheld. <3 (For a breakdown by @Lifewish, our staff Vita mourner, click here) What if? Far Cry 4 Split-Screen Co-Op Isn't a Thing Well, that sucks. I don't really play that many split-screen co-op games anymore, but there really aren't that many. I have lived 14 hours away from the friends with whom I used to play video games for the past 5 years, so I haven't really noticed this problem until recently. The announcement of Far Cry 4 saying no to split-screen couch co-op is sad for me to consider, but the mystery multiplayer has me hopeful. Elephant jousting is totally within the realm of possibility, so I'm going to be optimistic for what they have been planning.